How do I conceive of my son's illness? The appearance of guilt

How do I conceive of my son's illness?

The appearance of a disease in a son or daughters will always be unexpected and traumatic news to receive, even if at first there is a suspicion that something is wrong with the child's health, since it is normal for parents not to consider the possibility of the appearance of a chronic disease.

reaction of family members:

The reaction of family members, especially parents, will depend on their previous experience in managing illnesses, their belief system, their coping style and their support networks.

Upon receiving confirmation of the diagnosis, in the re-hospitalization processes and in the evolution of the disease, a series of emotions and reactions that are both contradictory but normal in the face of the situation are presented, such as feelings of pain, anguish, anger, joy, impotence, fear, despair or resignation and guilt, questions arise such as Will my behavior or state of mind have something to do with it during pregnancy?
Have I done something wrong?
What open me wrong?

parents to feel responsible for their child's illness:

It is common for parents to feel responsible for their child's illness and question their ability to protect him, however, when these ideas are held longer than they should and the feelings become more intense and prevalent over time, the issue becomes problematic.

It is important that parents and/or caregivers of a child with a chronic illness allow themselves to feel and express all the feelings that arise, in the way they feel comfortable, sometimes they will prefer to be alone and have an internal dialogue or look for a person that is willing to listen to them, free from criticism and judgment.

repressed feelings:

They must remember that repressed feelings are "a pressure cooker" that can explode at any moment, in addition to the fact that hiding feelings requires a great deal of energy, which could be used in the search for alternatives to deal with the disease.

promoting positive thoughts and active coping:

Likewise, it is recommended to be clear that the disease is not anyone's fault, they are phenomena that happen and period, they are part of the condition of being human, it is true that there are factors that favor the appearance of certain pathologies, but there are no equations for determine it, there are only probabilities, that is why very often the interpretation that parents and/or caregivers give of the disease leads them to feel guilty, because they have the need to look for cause-effect relationships and what if they had done...? And yes...? leaving aside the objective evidence that shows them that they had no control in the situation and the key is for parents and/or caregivers to stop looking for answers in themselves, to forgive themselves and accept that there are things that out of the hands and control of the human being,They can achieve this by promoting positive thoughts and active coping that allows them to learn from the experience and assume the situation in the healthiest way, avoiding living in a torment of ideas all their lives.